Sunday, 7 June 2009

Blue,Red and Black-A Dream of Despair, Desire and Death

Blue, Red and Black...
Melancholy spreads itself upon my back.
Travelling to hell, I've lost my track.
Hopeless hope isn't the only setback.
Sinister sins are now ready for attack.

I see two slabs of walls inclined perpendicular to each other, suspended in space. No ceiling, no floor; no light no darkness; nothing below, nothing beyond - just this piece of existence in the depths of my vision. The wall is monochromatic - an evenly painted - dark as well as luminous, stark as well as gloomy - shimmering as the ultramarine sea, secluded as the azure sky, pure as sapphire - The brightest, deepest, most prominent shade of Cobalt Blue. At the centre where the two walls meet to form the corner I see your tall form...you are seated hugging your knees. Your face is buried in the shadows of abysmal desolateness. Your eyes are resplendent with tears... the lovely brown decaffeinated into a translucent hazel... You are wearing a pair of blue jeans and a plain, white un-tucked shirt. Your frizzy hair is tousled and your glasses lie off-centre... I emerge from the depths of nothingness... My eyes meet yours and you smile faintly...I feel pained and anguished to see you in loneliness... Feeling the desire to hold and comfort you, I move towards you...
Red, Black and Blue...
Sex and desire of every hue.
Buried lovers emerge anew.
Dark passions blur my view.
Where should I hide?I've no clue!

You and I are together...The walls are slowly stained with blood... like paint, the red blood of my body covers the walls...As we come closer to each other the colour deepens...from its rosy hue to flaming ruby! I slip my fingers into yours and hold you close to me. You run your fingers on my back and embrace me tightly...We feel each other's warmth for what seems like eternity! I caress your hair and you hold my face in your hands... I look deep into your eyes and we come so close that all we can feel is each other's breath. You feel the desire to kiss me,so you slightly brush your lips against mine...Exactly at that moment, even before we are fully aware of what we are doing, a flash of liquid light, white and blinding, interrupts us and we are detatched eternally!
Black, Blue and Red...
I hear desperate wails in my head.
Distorted dreams blot my bed.
Frozen tears I incessantly shed.
Woe! I'm perpetually dead...

I see myself... I am sitting huddled in the corner... exactly at the place where you were seated. The walls are now charred Black...it appears like burnt wood-dilapidated and ruined to the core! I see absurd, frenzied shadows of unidentifiable forms on the walls... these shadows are desperately trying to run away...from what?I am unaware of! They all are lamenting, wailing in agony and pain... they all seem restless, frantic and absorbed in a stupor of frenzy. Their cacphony is tormenting! Agitated, I try looking down and see mutilated hands of different men pointing their fingers at me. I hear sounds of laughter, ridicule and insults; people mocking fun at me! I cover my ears with the palm of my hands but as I do so, the noise grows louder! I look at the hands and try recognizing them...Among these hands I am horrified to find yours! I can even hear your voice along with the others! Harrassed and in utter disbelief, I tear off my clothes. A glass coffin emerges from oblivion and encloses me within itself... In complete brutality and heartlessness, I rip open my breast... I take out my bleeding heart and hold it in my hands. My heart is nothing but a grotesque, malformed amalgation of blood and flesh... shapeless and broken like a mirror into a thousand shards! The noises and shadows fade from the walls and is replaced by my own shadow... The bizarre semblance of hands disappear as well... All that is visible now, is my shadow on the wall, content and happy...I can also see my bloodied dead body, with its heart ripped apart. I hear a calm voice from afar...it sounds like a hymn, a chant, a prayer, a blessing! It says, ''I'll always be there for you, Don't worry Anukriti''...I recognize it...it seems like a lullaby soothing me into an endless sleep... At last I am happy and satisfied...for I am dead!A smile lingers over my face, and my body remains entombed in the glass coffin forever!

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15 comments/suggestions:

setu said...

lovely story enclosed in lovelier array of loveliest words!

Jag (Google Profile) said...

Good one down the line

Harsh said...

came here via. Indiblogger ... nice blog ...

will be back to read your posts .. keep blogging ....

As the Mind Meanders said...

What...

Look.... I am at a loss of words... so let me blabber...

I am dumbstruck... astounded... How the hell can you write like that... how can anyone write like that... It is bloody brilliant... Christ... you are a talent mate... and you have a follower...

Keep writing... and thanks for adding me to your network on indiblogger... you have done me a favour...

I am still all shook up lady...

Subhayan "Wrahool" Mukerjee said...

... ur blog is an oxymoron. it's called sweetanukriti, yet there is nothing sweet in the posts .. why do you use ur beautiful writing ability to pen down such horrendous thoughts ... i hav NOT come across a single article which has made me laugh, and two, ur articles make me feel really sad for u ... i mean, is anything the reason for ur partiality for the grim side of life? Cn't u look at life throgh a differnet coloured glass, or atleast a different shade of the same colour? I am sure nice thoughts can also be written beautifully...

As the Mind Meanders said...

27 posts in three years... each one a gem... hardly prolific but very creative...

never replies to comments... marches to the sound of her own beat... and still has a good following...

the lord doesn't mingle with his creations...

Sharad Sharma said...

that is a high quality write and that can of course be said about each one of yours,on this blog.

I loved the expression,language and style of writing to the core.

Take a bow,Anukriti

Cheers,
Sharad
Medley

Sumit said...

You weave intricate images with your writing, Anukriti. Even without the pictures, the writing would be just as visua, just as haunting.

Awesome!

P.S. I'd suggest using a template that is broader, so that one has to scroll less to read a post.

silentlyexpress said...

oh my god, marvellous writing girl :)

et said...

wow! O_O
that's beautiful.

aahang said...

I am jealous of your writing that's what I can say.
Came here through the mind meanders.
Keep up the good work.

Joyson Johny said...

Excellent Anu. I cudin stop my hands from writin dis comment. Dis post is just fantastic. today u hav made me a fan of urs.. just cant help admittin..

CHEEKU said...

Do you ever read the comments?
Hauntingly beautiful writing.
I ll not add to the cliche here.

sowmya said...

impressive feel of words!
keep writing dear!
my best wishes..

prita said...

WRITE AND THE WORLD WILL READ WITH YOU.......